A lot of people

A lot of people
don't realize 
or believe this, but 

I was a man. 
Real one. 
Big! 
Downstairs? 
In the rec room 
with one beer in a hand, 
playing video games? 

You know the style. 

And six 
HUGE 
friends - 
DUDES? A little 
on the shrimpy side! 

Isn't it funny how a huge 
friend can be so small? 
All because I used to run
roughshod over these clowns 

every time!

'Cause they would kick
my ass up on screen. And
with just one beer - with
that crowd? We had to pass it
around town: these

were bad-asses. 

By the time word
got back, there were
only four of us. 

Some
can't
hang. And 
still the same
beer! Open! Flat, and
all those guys? Nobody
brave enough to sip it
in front of the boys! 

I call it courtesy
or hospitality.  
I was the host! That 
was my beer! I wasn't
going to swill that with
all my men going thirsty
on me, let alone dead

sober. 

Come on. So Mickey - in
the beer, pass it around,

now 

- nobody remembers this, 
but every time I try to tell 
the story somebody's always 
correcting me. "You weren't
there!" "That didn't happen!"

Which is it?

Guys, that was my beer and you
want to tell me I wasn't there
when you can't even remember? 

People, that story is real. It's
based on a real story, too,
and that happened. Well
you all can vouch! You
just heard it from the
mouth. I tell you 

a man can't make
that shit 
up
here.