the best-laid tropes

The spectacular failure 
of the most high-profile 
top-secret mission 
to outer space ever conceived, 
attempted or faked left all
of us here on the edge
of our seats, smoking
like fiends and deceased
in the wake of our crashed 
and shattered hopes. This team 
were all charming, cocky superstars 
destined against all odds to save 
our days, battling heroically against and with
omnidirectional sexual tension so thick
you could butter it, only to ram triumph
down the open maw of defeat
and gloat

But it didn't happen that way 
Something happened out there, and 
and it happened quick, so we'll never
know what. 'Cause the rays they supposed
themselves to save us from (so we'd supposed,
too) came down. It was obvious something
went wrong. We were all rendered drooling 
mutants, or charcoal effigies. Fork it

with a stick, boys 

this world is done