For Every Contingency

I think most
of those time travel infant Hitler
assassination plots would fail hard.
The fucking disciplined hand-picked
chrono-assassin would get there

and be like "I CAN'T DO IT"

Mission control: "WHAT'S WRONG?"

Chronoassassin: "I THOUGHT HE'D
HAVE THAT LITTLE MUSTACHE! HE
HASN'T GOT ONE - THIS IS JUST A BABY."

Mission control: "Hold tight, C.A. Check
your left breast pocket, we've planned
for every contingency."

Then he checks the pocket
and there's a little stick-on mustache
in there. Perfect for baby

Happy ending aw